*** Newsbreak from Jamaica ***
The media haven't got the details yet, but we have it on good authority that
in the weekend raids by the Jamaican Federal Police they caught three associates
of Osama Bin Laden.
Bin Smokin and Bin Drinkin were taken into custody, along with Bin Stealin.
A fourth terrorist, Bin Workin, could not be found anywhere.
A man is walking down the streets of Manhattan with his kid. All of a sudden
they stop in front of a park, and the man comments to his son... "Just
think, not too long ago the Twin Towers used to be here...". So the son
asks him with an intrigued look in his face..."Dad,what were the Twin
Towers?". "They were two very tall buildings with lots of offices, but
31 years ago a bunch of terrorists from the middle east crashed a plane into
each one and they collapsed". "Dad, what was the middle east?"
(or, another version)
Intrigued by the comment the son then asks, "What were the twin towers,
dad?" To which the father replies, "They were two of the largest
buildings in the world, and they housed many thousands of offices.... but in
2001 they were destroyed by Arabs."
The son pauses for a while and then asks, "What were Arabs, dad?"
Citizens of Afghanistan are reportedly looking forward with great
anticipation to reports of an international air show to be held in the skies
over their nation.
An unnamed official informed us that, "Now the rest of the world will
look upon our beloved city with great honor just as they do to Farnborough,
England, and Paris, France", referring to the sites of two other famous
international air shows.
The exact date and time of the upcoming Kabul International Air show has not yet been announced. It is believed that event organizers feel that such
an announcement would detract from the fun of the celebration by "spoiling
the surprise".
Unlike most air shows the Kabul Air show will feature almost no static ground
displays but will have an unusually high number of aerial demonstrations and
fly-bys. "We are most pleased by this feature of our air show. Instead of a
lot of different kinds of airplanes just sitting around on the tarmac, the
aircraft attending our show will actually be up in the air demonstrating what
they do best!" we were told.
Participation will probably be heaviest by aircraft of the United States Air Force and Marine Corps. including appearances by F-15's, F-16's, A-10's,
B-52's and Apache helicopters. It is rumored that opening ceremonies will
feature a Tomahawk-cruise fireworks display. A few B-2's, and F-117A's may also
help out in some unseen capacity.
Several other counties have expressed an interest in sending representatives.
These include all nineteen nations in the NATO alliance as well as Australia.
The excitement generated for this gala event has even prompted the Israeli Air
Force to apply for participation.
Of course, no one is more excited than the Afghan people themselves. Great
numbers of them are in the streets of Kabul looking constantly heavenward in
gratitude for the historic event which will soon take place in their skies. It
has been observed that some are so concerned about missing the show that even as
they bow to the East they keep snatching worried glances towards the West.
Thousands, in fact, have been seen leaving the city and fleeing to the mountains
carrying food and blankets - obviously anxious to get a good vantage point for the air show, and to make a picnic of it.